Another great weekend of football. Who would have thought the Broncos and Jets would be 3-0? Or that the Titans and Dolphins would be 0-3?
The Lions finally won a game after 21 months of losing and have the same record as both Superbowl teams from last season.
But that is what is great about the NFL. Any given Sunday any team can win and any team can lose.
1. New Orleans Saints: their passing offense was sttoped, but they managed to win it over the ground. Pick your poison.
2. New York Giants: the game was more like a scrimmage vs the Bucs this week and they dominated.
3. Baltimore Ravens: if you started the Baltimore D in your fantasy football league you probably cashed in some points. They didn’t have any trouble against Brady Quinn or Derek Anderson.
4. Indianapolis Colts: the 2009 defense brings back memories of their 2006 defense when they won the Superbowl.
5. Minnesota Vikings: Vintage Brett Favre. His last second pass to newly acquired TE Greg Lewis is why they brought him back and that is why he came back. If you haven’t seen it, CLICK HERE.
6. New York Jets: Rex Ryan and Mark Sanchez have this team winning when they shouldn’t be.
7. New England Patriots: at least Tom Brady got a TD this week.
8. San Francisco 49ers: even without Frank Gore they were one play away from beating the Vikings in Minnesota. Too bad Mike Singletary forgot Brett Favre is still Brett Favre.
9. Pittsburgh Steelers: they remain in the top ten because they still are defending the Super Bowl Champions, however they better start playing as champions if they want to defend their crown.
10. Atlanta Falcons: they battled against the Patriots for 3 quarters. They must of forgot the game lasts for 4 quarters.
11. San Diego Chargers: they struggled in the red zone once again. Not every team they face will be the Dolphins.
12. Cincinnati Bengals: a good football team. They should be 3-0
13. Chicago Bears: Jay Cutler has five TD in two games. His season opening debacle must have been an anomaly, now only if Matt Forte can run like he did last year.
14. Green Bay Packers: This is Aaron Rodgers team now, he threw for 269 yards and two touchdowns and also ran for 38 yards and a TD on the ground.
15. Dallas Cowboys: finally the defense showed up, but when will the Real Tony Romo?
16. Denver Broncos: I wonder if the Chargers thought they were going to be behind in the standings to the Broncos after 3 weeks.
17. Philadelphia Eagles: the big news is that Michael Vick played finally with Eagles. The bad news is that he completed no passes and had one rush for 7 yards. The Eagles may no longer need Vick with Kolb taking over and winning.
18. Arizona Cardinals: like the Steelers, they are the other Super Bowl team with the same record as the Lions. What does that tell you?
19. Tennessee Titans: mistake free football. A lesson the Titans haven’t bothered to learn.
20. Buffalo Bills: the Saints defense held T.O. without a catch for the first time since his rookie season in 1996, ending a 185-game streak that was the longest of any active player.
21. Seattle Seahawks: you can’t win with Seneca Wallace running the show.
22. Jacksonville Jaguars: Maurice Jones-Drew had his first 100-yard game of the season and scored three touchdowns.
23. Houston Texans: they won at Nashville and looked impressive. They loss against the Jags and looked like the same ol’ Texans.
24. Oakland Raiders: time is running against JaMarcus Russell. He’s not proving to be worth all the money Al Davis is paying him. Too bad they let Jeff Garcia go.
25. Detroit Lions: they won!!!
26. Washington Redskins: they lost to the Lions.
27. Miami Dolphins: winning the time possession does not means you will win a football game, at least not for the Dolphins.
28. Kansas City Chiefs: one candidate to imitate the Lions 2008 season.
29. Cleveland Browns: Brady Quinn or Derek Anderson? The Brown’s problems are not only in the QB position. If their running game was any good perhaps they wouldn’t need to worry about who was their QB.
30. Carolina Panthers: they could of beat the Cowboys in Dallas, but penalties and turnovers hurt them in the 2nd half.
31. Tampa Bay Buccaneers: Did the Bucs play this weekend? It seems like the Giants were the only team on the field.
32. St. Louis Rams: Mark Bulger is hurt and Laurent Robinson is out for the season. From bad to worse.
More signs of the Apocalypse came our way in Week 1. The Bills nearly beat the Patriots, and the Raiders nearly beat the Chargers. Troy Polamalu is out for a month while he finds the sorcery required to defeat the Madden Curse. Jeremy Shockey found the endzone twice after being held out of it for all of 2008. All this in the midst of Lady Luck treating the Bengals like they unceremoniously ditched her for a one-night stand with Ashlee Simpson (which would piss anyone off).
The landscape of the NFL has been overhauled after Week 1 and the Furious One is here to break things down for you.
1. Pittsburgh Steelers (1-0 SU/ATS)
Losing Troy Polamalu is huge, but the disappearing act of their rushing attack is a bigger deal. Steeler fans may not like it, but Big Ben and Holmes are going airborne in 2009.
Next Game: Pittsburgh (-1) vs. Chicago
2. New Orleans Saints (1-0 SU/ATS)
Drew Brees torched the skies for 6 touchdowns, and used five different receivers to do it. Even without Pierre Thomas, Reggie Bush was used more as a receiver which could mean big things for the USC star. The Saints are OVER achievers this year for sure.
Next Game: New Orleans vs. Philadelphia (-1)
3. Tennessee Titans (1-0 SU/ATS)
A loss to the defending champs hurt, but they were one Ray Bironis field-goal away from tying that game. LenDale and Chris Johnson couldn’t find room to run, but that won’t be the case every week. Jeff Fisher’s boys get an extra nod for busting the spread on the defending champs.
Next Game: Houston vs. Tennessee (-7)
4. Minnesota Vikings (1-0 SU/ATS)
Don’t worry about Brett Favre’s endurance. Adrian Peterson has you (and the spread) covered. And if you’re worried about Favre going the distance in to the dead of winter, don’t be. The Vikings play in a dome for Christ’s sakes. Chester Taylor has already agreed to shovel Brett’s driveway.
Next Game: Minnesota (-9.5) vs. Detroit
5. Philadelphia Eagles (1-0 SU/ATS)
The back injury to McNabb has paved the way for a three-way fight to the finish between Jeff Garcia, Michael Vick and an injured McNabb. Tell me you saw that coming in 2009! With the acquisition of Garcia, at least Vick gets to relive all that prison sex he got used to over the last two years.
Next Game: New Orleans vs. Philadelphia (-1)
6. Baltimore Ravens (1-0 SU/ATS)
Hello, Joe Flacco and Ray Rice! The future of Baltimore’s offense is thriving in the now, but defense may be a thing of the past. Letting the Chiefs get on the board for 24-points is inexcusable.
Next Game: Baltimore vs. San Diego (-4)
7. Green Bay Packers (1-0 SU/ATS)
The defense raped Jay Cutler for everything he was worth (just kidding, the Broncos already did that), but Aaron Rodgers is out to prove that he deserved to be the heir apparent to Favre. It’s now a two-horse race in the NFC North between Favre and his former team.
Next Game: Cincinnati vs. Green Bay (-10)
8. New England Patriots (1-0 SU, 0-1 ATS)
The only reason they’re this high after narrowly escaping Buffalo is because of that fourth-quarter effort by Brady. He posted 378-yards and two scores to Ben Watson to lead the Pats over the futility of the Bills. In a tribute to the great Patrick Swayze: “Nobody backs Brady in to a corner!”
Next Game: New England (-6.5) vs. NYJ
9. Dallas Cowboys (1-0 SU/ATS)
The Cowboys appeared lost at times during the tilt against Tampa, but they found a way to keep pumping up the scoreboard. Romo’s electric effort also protected the big spread for the Dallas betting investors.
Next Game: NYG vs. Dallas (-3)
10. New York Giants (1-0 SU/ATS)
Expect agonizing gut-check wins for the Giants all year long. They’re not great, but they’re very, very good. People are paying way too much to the lack of experience at the receiver position. They should be giving credit to a defense that could be top-3 in the NFL.
Next Game: NYG vs. Dallas (-3)
11. Indianapolis Colts (1-0 SU, 0-1 ATS)
No running game? No receivers? No freaking problem. Trust in Peyton Manning this year…just not when it comes to the betting line.
Next Game: Indianapolis (-3.5) vs. Miami
12. Atlanta Falcons (1-0 SU/ATS)
The Dirty Birds held the Miami offense in check all day, and the offense was cold and calculated. Matt Ryan’s sophomore slump has been greatly exaggerated. Michael Turner’s status as an elite back wasn’t.
Next Game: Carolina vs. Atlanta (-7)
13. New York Jets (1-0 SU/ATS)
Dirty Sanchez is still a work in progress, but he’ll have Thomas Jones (107 yards, 2 touchdowns) to take the load off his shoulders. That Jets defense with Bart Scott looks scary. If the only concern they have is Sanchez, then things are looking up for the Jets. It’s about time, frankly.
Next Game: New England (-6.5) vs. NYJ
14. Seattle Seahawks (1-0 SU/ATS)
Don’t get too excited about the 28-0 skunking of the Rams, but this team is ready to take over the dwindling NFC West and return to the playoffs. This could very well be Matt Hasselbeck’s swan song.
Next Game: Seattle (-1) vs. San Francisco 49ers
15. San Diego Chargers (1-0 SU, 0-1 ATS)
What was more confusing on Monday night? The Raiders giving the Chargers a run for their money, or Tomlinson not being a part of the game-winning drive? They won’t stay in the cellar for long, but you know things are going to get bad when a superstar is in Norv Turner’s dog house. Oakland just gave Baltimore the blue print to decimate the Chargers.
Next Game: Baltimore vs. San Diego (-4)
16. San Francisco 49ers (1-0 SU/ATS)
Shaun Hill’s never going to be a stat machine, but he’s going to get you in a position to win games. The Niners have a lot to prove if they’re going to give the Seahawks a run for their money. And guess who they match up against in Week 2…
Next Game: Seattle (-1) vs. San Francisco 49ers
17. Buffalo Bills (0-1 SU, 1-0 ATS)
Trent Edwards does a great impersonation of Peyton Manning. Too bad his receivers do great impressions of Braylon Edwards. If the Bills were a soccer team, some Bills fan would’ve killed McKelvin in the parking lot for that fumble. Sure he says he would’ve run it out 100 times out of 100 times, but would’ve he had fought for those extra two yards causing him to lose the damn ball?
Next Game: Tampa Bay vs. Buffalo (-5)
18. Jacksonville Jaguars (0-1 SU, 1-0 ATS)
So we can all agree that David Garrard is not the answer in Jacksonville right? Right? Hello? Is this thing on??
Next Game: Arizona vs. Jacksonville (-5.5)
19. Tampa Bay Buccaneers (0-1 SU/ATS)
The Bucs threw the book at the Cowboys, but the defense let them down. Don’t forget that this team is still waiting for the return of Jermaine Phillips, but the return of Cadillac Williams makes this team much more dangerous than people think. So does a patty-cake schedule.
Next Game: Tampa Bay vs. Buffalo (-5)
20. Oakland Raiders (0-1 SU, 1-0 ATS)
If any team was going to get screwed by some technicality in the rule book, it’s the Raiders. Still, for once they look like they’re headed in the right direction, and could be an upset specialist against the betting line. Let’s not forget that Michael Bush and Run DMC were two of the best backs during their tenure in college.
Next Game: Oakland vs. KC (-4.5)
21. Arizona Cardinals (0-1 SU/ATS)
It’s a bad sign when your top-rusher, Beanie Wells, nets just 29-yards on the ground and your top receiver in Week 1 is Tim Hightower. It’s even worse when you lose to the Niners.
Next Game: Arizona vs. Jacksonville (-5.5)
22. Miami Dolphins (0-1 SU/ATS)
Everybody doubted their ability to recreate an incredible 2008 season. Everyone was right.
Next Game: Indianapolis (-3.5) vs. Miami
23. Washington Redskins (0-1 SU/ATS)
It doesn’t matter how stacked your defense is if your team can’t move the ball up the field offensively.
Next Game: St. Louis vs. Washington (-9.5)
24. Chicago Bears (0-1 SU/ATS)
Without Urlacher, the Bears looked awful on defense. Even worse? Jay Cutler looking like Rex Grossman and Kyle Orton.
Next Game: Pittsburgh (-1) vs. Chicago
25. Denver Broncos (1-0 SU/ATS)
They needed a miracle to beat the Bengals. They’ll need about 16 more of those to win more than four games this year.
Next Game: Cleveland vs. Denver (-3.5)
26. Houston Texans (0-1 SU/ATS)
The defense got busted up by big plays, and Matt Schaub looked downright terrible in the opener. Andre Johnson didn’t even lead the team in receptions. Who would’ve thought that any team would so desperately rely on the health of Kevin Walters?
Next Game: Houston vs. Tennessee (-7)
27. Detroit Lions (0-1 SU/ATS)
Matt Stafford is still looking for his first touchdown. The Lions are still looking for their first win in 19 games. With a matchup against Favre this weekend, make that 20 games.
Next Game: Minnesota (-9.5) vs. Detroit
28. Cincinnati Bengals (0-1 SU/ATS)
What’s the prop bet on Marvin Lewis finally losing his job? -400? -5000?
Next Game: Cincinnati vs. Green Bay (-10)
29. Cleveland Browns (0-1 SU/ATS)
The Dog Pound is asking themselves if ditching Romeo in exchange for the Man Genius was such a good idea after all…
Next Game: Cleveland vs. Denver (-3.5)
30. Carolina Panthers (0-1 SU/ATS)
Jake Delhomme has now banked $20 million guaranteed for 10 turnovers in two games thanks to his new contract. When do the Panthers apply for a bailout from the U.S. Treasury? Strange and relevant betting fact: Jake has 10 interceptions in his last two games against franchises named after birds.
Next Game: Carolina vs. Atlanta (-7)
31. Kansas City Chiefs (0-1 SU/ATS)
Even with Matt Cassel returning in a couple weeks, this team looks morbid. Wasn’t anyone in KC reading the reports of Larry Johnson’s demise back in 2007? Get with the times!
Next Game: Oakland vs. KC (-4.5)
32. St. Louis Rams (0-1 SU/ATS)
I think the Rams need to start asking themselves, “I wonder what we could get for Steven Jackson?”
Next Game: St. Louis vs. Washington (-9.5)